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Sunday afternoon, as the shocking details of the shooting at gay nightclub Pulse in Orlando trickled in and the totality of the horror was becoming clear, I had a strange realization: I’ve been to that bar.As a gay man, I want to let straight folks in on a little secret: For many of us, when we’re traveling out of town, the first thing we do after setting down our bags in the hotel room is open up Yelp and find the nearest gay bar. Sure, grabbing a beer at the hotel bar might be easier. But whatever strange town you’re in, a gay bar is an extension of home.By "home," I don’t mean where you’re from, I mean someplace where you are welcome, where you can relax, where you are instantly understood without saying a word.